1. stuffing me with food 24 hours a day like a foie gras goose for the slaughter.
2. me on an autumn drive: mmm smell that woodburning stove, i love that.
grandmother: or maybe they're on fire.
3. to the huge squash she was wrestling into submission with a massive knife: oi vey, i swear to god, if this squash doesnt cut me some slack i'm going to take it outside and smash it open with a sledge hammer.
4. after making me stick my (naturally cold) hands into a preheated oven for five minutes: i'm telling you, youre just going to have to start wearing gloves around the house or your going to loose your fingers, one by one.
5. after hearing another republican ad on tv: well, my neighbor, muffy, the one with the obese cat, she says she heard from her daughter who knows one of their family friends, that mccain beats his wife. id believe it. just look at his eyes! he's completely mashugana.
No comments:
Post a Comment