1.08.2009

if this song were any more appropriate

it would have to be streamed directly from my brain
as it were, its simply missy higgins hitting the neurosis nail on the proverbial head.



they keep saying this is part of the ride but i'm not getting stronger

if only i could sing so i could turn my bouts of self pity and loneliness into something worthwhile as missy does.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Is a strengthening necessary?
Is it only a ride if we grow stronger?
What if we grow “weaker”?
Is there a "strengthening" in deconstruction?
What if we don’t know whether we grow up or down or even if there is any growth at all?
Do such qualifiers do justice to the events or the (un)qualified?
What if being part of the ride is enough?
And if we experience it, isn’t it then a piece of the ride?
And the better we can become at stepping back, and looking at that piece, and seeing it for what it is, for the undulation (“up” or “down” i.e. “stronger” or “weaker”) it creates in our ride and how that affects our momentum, our energy, our velocity, then isn’t that all we could ask for?
To be able to see it for what it is?
Our job.
Our lover.
Our writing.
Our foot.
Our car.

All their own pieces in our life, and thus, all part of the ride.

Is my writing worthless, less worth, when it does not make me “stronger”?
When I don’t strike upon some incredible revelation?
Maybe.
Do I write for those times?
Maybe. I do enjoy them.
But I am still glad to have written when I have not written much of anything.
I am still glad to have mistaken words for my thoughts when that is the case.
Because it is work and what is growth if not work?
Work is so because it is an act of addressing change (and thus creating it in the realm of consciousness), and physically realizing it if we so desire.

Is your job worth less to you because it “works” things you value less than others?
Are you firm that your values are the values you want?
Are they your values?
What is the value of being able to answer “yes” to such questions?


What about two people, person A and B, who try a new food from some street market and person A gets sick and is throwing up and bed-ridden for 2 days.
Person B, however, is fine and, in fact, loved the food. A new favorite.


What are the differences between them?
Who has grown “stronger”? Who has realized “more”? Who has “grown” more?

Is “worth” increased more by the quantity of knowledge gained or by the degree of comfort given?