i am on the bus from boston to new york and there is a girl next to me my age wearing owl librarian glasses that magnify her eyes to alien proportions holding a book two inches from her face and i cant look over there or i'll laugh out loud as i allready have twice but covered them tactfully with snorts and coughs and i wouldnt care so much but poor things probably been tortured her whole life and people like that are liable to snap at any point and i dont want to be the proverbial straw.

these days i have been laughing more and i know that has to do with my company in particular my roomate who has a way of escalating small laughs to the level of epic and entirely incomprehensible jokes like the other day when we were at the grocery store and i mentioned that we should get mango sorbet and two hours later we were screetching the word MAANGOO at the top of our lungs and then collapsing into near incontinent fits of laughter and i really have no idea what came in between.

i have also been sleeping less and less and am increasingly conscious of my own mortality and i know those are related issues because if i were to fill the majority of my hours with something that makes me feel awake and alive like the way i feel howling mango at the moon then mawybe i wouldnt lie awake calculating how many hours of my life i will have slept through by the time i turn 25.